I wonder where I've been

Yep,
I'm aware that I haven't been about for a little bit. That isn't to say that I haven't been thinking about writing. Little things like recurrent dreams, crappy days and poisonous employees run through my mind for things to drop a note of, but I've been too lazy to do anything about it.
In fact, and I know this is bad, I'm blogging now to get out of writing an employee's review.
The Ireland trip is less than 3 weeks away now. I still haven't received my passport yet. I'm afraid the gov't is just holding on to it to piss me off. It isn't like I'm interesting enough to have a gov't conspiracy against me, so the only reason they would do it would the peripheral enjoyment of making my life suck just a little more.
I'm having a crappy time of it otherwise though. I'm still binge eating, (I really need to get that puking thing down), but I've been trying to do it with healthier things. Instead of binging with ice cream, I will use bananas. It isn't quite the same thing though. Exercising is even less realistic for me. In fact, I've noticed that I run out of breath when I'm talking to someone. Now we can interpret that as a sign that I'm obese, (which the gov't has already classified me as, thanks. Got that memo) or that I smoke too much. Hmmm. Flip of the coin for which is worse, or which I plan on fixing anytime soon. I'll get back to you on that.
One of my favorite authors came to Louisville the other day. I sat with all these other women, some aspiring writers, some rabid fans of Jenny Crusie, some both. It scared the shit out of me. I looked at these women, who may be perfectly happy in their lives, but looked to me like "This is your future if you keep this wicked path" type of Afterschool Movie. I keep going through life picking out things and saying, "I don't want that. I don't want to become that. Shoot me if I ever wear that," but I can't make up my mind what I do want or what will be acceptable.
So, yeah! Life is great. Things are just perking along.
Right to hell, but they are perking along.