Everyone needs something

Fall has arrived, thank the gods. The morning air is cool, the afternoons are still tolerable and the evenings require a sweatshirt over your jean shorts. This is the perfect time of year. In fact, I got to sleep in the morning, as much as the cat would let me, and tuck myself under the covers.

I feel so leisurely decadent this morning. I got up when I wanted to, I made a pot of coffee, actually walked on the treadmill this morning and worked up a sweat, took a cool shower and am just hanging out in the living room, watching the cat play with catnip, feeling the breeze come in from outside and listening to music. I have to go to work in a couple of hours and I just don't care. Eventually I will get dressed, and walk out the door, but until then, I'm just chillen and loving it.

Work has been a trial lately, but I'm getting used to the pace. Now, if I can just master getting things done as well, life will be close to perfect in that realm of my life. The other pieces are still hard to get used to. My next door neighbor (no, not Moe but I don't know what to call this guy yet) has been outside the last couple of nights grilling when I step out to catch a cigarette. There has got to be something wrong with him or something wrong with me. He doesn't listen to a damn word I say and I often have to repeat myself, which is beginning to be annoying. I'm thinking that he just isn't listening, but it could be that I'm so boring that he can't bring himself to listen. Either way, he and I were talking (read he was complaining about his 14 year old son again) and he decided I need to come over and have dinner with him some night. I left it open, but I really don't want to.

I've changed in the last few weeks. I'm tired of listening to people tell me what is wrong with their lives without giving a shit about mine. I've been so used to doing it I automatically do it with every friendship I have, but no more. I want the person to be interested in me, not just my ears dammit. I'm not going to settle for anything less either. I mean, hell, someone has got to find me interesting.

Somewhere.

Right?

Bad Signs

Should I take it as a bad sign that ladybugs have flocked to my door? I have no less than 5 ladybugs on my door and two in the house. I can't remember how that works.
I've been bad recently. I went out and got a ipod shuffle. Here I am again, spending money I shouldn't be spending for a toy. This one doesn't even have any vibration. It does, however, have a wicked cool sound to it.
I'm getting a day off tomorrow. I'm so happy about that. I was running on fumes today. I still didn't walk out the door on time, but I didn't stay as late as my new assistant either. I'm just happy I don't have to be at work at 6 a.m. tomorrow. I'm all about sleeping in, but I'm sure I will be up early anyway. I have to hit the store and pick up some crochet hooks. I seem to have lost mine in the the move. I still have boxes all over the apartment too. This place is a wreck. I'm sure I'm also going to use the day to clean up a little.
One of my old associates called me yesterday. She wanted to let me know she'd seen Bruno on tv talking about a haunted house. Two days before that I heard him on the radio talking about the same damn house and today in the paper he was giving yet another interview about the house. Technically it is a haunted building, but who am I to quibble? I swear the universe pisses me off sometimes. If he and I aren't meant to be friends, or I'm not to play a role in his life, then why does he keep popping up every damn place? It isn't like these aren't things that I could be missing. Life is a matter of moments all strung together, hasn't someone said that? They are often and easily missed moments as well as connections. Why can't I be missing these moments? All it does is emphasize to me that I'm fucking up again in trying to find friends. I can't find people down here to make a connection with that don't work with me or for me.
There is a point. There is a point. There is a point. The fates have to have more to do than just fuck with my life. Don't they?

Lost Cause

Just a quick note before I go back into work - people in general suck. I've been thinking about this for a little while, and this is my conclusion. I'd like to be a glass is half full kind of girl, but day in and day out, people pretty much suck.
I only say this because I'm lucky to have exceptions float in and out of my life. Yesterday was a real downer of a day. At the end, I had this woman pretty much tell me that because I'm single I don't know how to deal with customers, especially men. There is a whole back story here, but the gist of it, I'm not feminine enough, in her opinion. Her rant ate at me for a few hours last night, and then one of my co-workers called me. I didn't catch the phone in time, but the message he left made me smile. He was going on about how he'd heard I was too manish, and if I was going to finally try and be feminine, to keep in mind the skirt I wore was in code. I laughed for ten minutes.
When sucky people are the rule, it is the exceptions that will always come up and surprise you.
I had no idea I was that lucky.

Holy Hell, it is a Southern Thing

Ok, so apparently I was wrong. Hanging pictures is a prelude to sex! Only in the south people, only in the south. Pay attention to the last part of this guy's blog.

Nothing's gonna change my world

I'm so not a very nice person. And I'm going to hell. Probably at the same time. I ran into Moe in the parking lot a couple of days ago. I was on my way to work and he was coming out of his place at the same time. We exchanged small talk and I went on my way. Though that isn't the reason I'm going to hell. Nope, the idiot just walked up to my front door and wanted to come in. I told him it wasn't a good time and he assumed I'd been taking a nap. The real reason I didn't want him coming in was because I was watching an old episode of MASH and I didn't want to miss it. I ran with the sleeping thing and told him I would be by on Sunday. Course, I'm working all day Sunday, but he doesn't know that. It also doesn't help that the apartment looks like a tornado swept through it. Clothes are everywhere. I haven't even had a shower and I feel like something you've scraped off the street. I'd feel worse about it, but he says, as he's apologizing for waking me up, "I thought I'd come over and you could cook dinner." What the fuck? I've heard of people inviting themselves over for dinner, but not before it is made! I swear I don't understand this guy.
Trainwreck sent me some pics of KC. I think I miss the town a little bit. Especially images like this. There may not be much to KC in terms of landscape, but when the sun comes up, the whole world can see it in Kansas City. Apparently he also believes I should be in Chicago, but it really is a moot point now. I've already taken the new position and I can't exactly up and move. Plus, there is still potential here. I just haven't found it yet. I always had a good time with Trainwreck though when we'd go hunting for pics or just hanging out. He is one of my friends that enjoys life for what it is. He even posts his pics online here. I visit it from time to time to remember what Kansas is like, and sometimes to remind myself why I left.
Work has been crazy busy. Today was my day off and I spent the whole damn day at my old building. But we got everything audited. So that helps, a little, although I'm having difficulty caring. I'm working this weekend too, which completely bites. Oh well, I have to get used to doing things the hard way. My boss dropped by yesterday too. Kept saying, "I hope you are half as excited about this opportunity as I'm excited for you." Then he started talking about what an great opportunity I have to move up if I do well, because, "you know, there aren't that many women in your position in our company. You could really take off if you do well here." Why, yes, I'm well aware that my tits help me, but is my boss really supposed to point that out? I'm really not sure. The worst part is that I don't know how to take what he said. It could be that he is just speaking plainly (which I prefer), and stating the obvious. It does say something that I was given this position. My chest didn't get me this job, my talents did, which makes me feel better about what he said. And, yes, I know that it would look good for the company to promote me because a good portion of the company does reside on Mars, but that wouldn't diminish all the hard work I'm going to have to do to get there. And, on top of that, I don't know if that is what I want. I have too much crap on my plate now. I can't think about this.
I was talking to a friend today. He was going on about needing to find out what he wants to do with life. He is stressing about work, kicking thoughts around his head, trying to find what makes him happy. I sat and listened because that was what he needed most. I offered a few meaningless words and tried to help but I really couldn't. The problem is how many of us are really happy? How do we find what makes us happy? Not that I'm dissatisfied with where I am now, (which we all know I am), but how does one go about finding the thing that makes him or her happy? When I changed buildings, I was offered a severance package, or I could take the building I'm in. It wasn't forever long, but it was enough to make me stop and think. The only problem is I would have no idea what I would do with my life. I don't think I could go back and dust off my journalism degree and start at the bottom. I'm not even sure I can even write anymore.
Which brings me to my next mental dilemna. My mother is writing a book. The woman is incredibly talented at most everything she touches. She is an artist with fabric and now she is writing. Don't get me wrong, I love my mother very much. Our relationship gets stronger now that I've gotten older and we know how to deal with one another. Yet, my ego is still having trouble with the fact that my mother is more talented all around than I am. I thought I had skills, but I've been shown up. Of course, I've never said anything along these lines to her, and I am so very proud of her. But it all goes back to being happy. It has taken her to her mid 50s to find happiness and contentment with what she is doing. Do I have to wait that long? I'm not sure I will make it. I keep thinking of Steve Martin calling home to tell his mother he had finally found his "special purpose". When will I be able to do that, or will I ever? Is my lesson this trip to learn to love mediocrity? The day to day grind?
Pass the Baileys.

Even Santa Claus Believes In You

I have a secret. Not like all of us don't have some sort of secret, hence the writing of blogs bitching about what is going on in our lives without really revealing who we are, but I digress. There are certain songs/soundtracks/artists that I will listen to just to move me out of - or put me into whatever mood I need to be in. These tend to be off the beaten path type songs. They are my guilty pleasure. It isn't because the melody is especially well written, but the sentiment behind the words that drives me.
I've had such a hard time at work lately that I've needed to hear music that soothes me, as well as inspires me. In fact, I've played "Walking in Memphis" so many times lately that I actually know the whole damn thing. Between that one, "Big Time" by Big & Rich, "Feel Good Inc" by Gorillaz, as well as "Ain't No Sunshine" by Bill Withers and "I Ain't Drunk" by Albert Collins, I've been lulling myself into a false sense of security walking out of my building. I keep pretending I'm not losing my mind, but I'm afraid my subconscious knows better. I'm not sleeping well at night, dreaming about work and all the things that are going wrong. One of my employees called me earlier in fact to inform me that my boss will be stopping by tomorrow. My biggest concern right now isn't that he is coming by, but that I'm not sure if I can control my tongue if he gets on my nerves. Wish me luck.
I got on the treadmill today after work. I was trying to walk away from my stress at work. I think it helped a little. After all, my carrot after using the treadmill was a margarita. I think it is time to make another.
By the way, I'm not going to reveal the artist who helped me today. Suffice to say, the title is an obscure verse. But it makes me feel good to know that. Although, I'm not sure if I should be reassured that a mythic figure believes in me. I'm more afraid that he is the only one who does. Even the cat is having doubts.

Something in the air

Don't you hate that feeling of anticipation? That vague feeling that something you have no control over is creeping into your life, plotting when the best time is to smack you upside your head? You can almost smell the trouble standing outside your door. It is a combination of stale sweat, loud cologne and grease. The smell isn't brimstone, but if you stand very carefully in the right spot, you can still smell something burning, like a cigarette left by your bedroom window with no one standing there. Your heart races while you try and figure out clues that have no puzzle. I half expect a raven to fly into my house spouting enigmatic words.
I hate the anticipation. I hate that I can't see the events that will be transpiring in short order. I have no control of that. The unknown doesn't completely scare me, but it frustrates the hell out of me. I have to react to these things as they happen, and I'm scared I won't react correctly.
I was talking to Stais earlier tonight. She's scared of failing at work. I told her that because she is a fucking genius (which she is, by the by, irritates the hell out of me that I'm not nearly as smart as she is) she will figure out the best way to do her job. What I forgot to tell her is that everybody has to screw up sometime. It is one of the best ways to learn. No matter how much we don't want to screw up because it peaks our pride, and has the potential to make us look stupid, we all come out better for it. Not one of us learned to walk immediately. We took spills and fell on our ass, but we didn't care because something drove us to get up and try again. How many of us can say the same thing as adults? In fact, Stais called me on it earlier. Told me that I was looking for instant intimacy by sleeping with guys immediately. I didn't want to wait to learn about the person, I just want it to be right, right away. Is that what I've learned from all my relationships that have failed? Fuck 'em first so they can't decide later that there really is something about you they don't like? What is it I'm scared of? Falling on my ass time and time again in front of someone I want to impress?
So now I have a new challenge. Which sucks because I hate challenges, but now I have to try and go through the dances with meeting people and not sleeping with them. Not even a kiss. No more instant gratification. Which, of course, means I will have to buy lots of batteries. Maybe I'll have to get some of those rechargeable deals. Ahhh learning, I'm too old for this shit.
An update of my pitiful social life will be brief:
I still haven't heard from Bruno. Of course, I'm still not chasing him either. He is busy in his "season" and I'm not going to interrupt that. Of course, it may also be that he really wasn't interested in me as a friend at all, but if I think about that too long, it will just depress me, so I'm going to believe he just doesn't have time for me. Not sure, though, which one hurts less.
Saw Big D today. I had to go into my old building because a sewer line backed up and flooded a bunch of buildings around there. He was part of the team to assess the damage. He walked past me and I asked him if this was all his fault. He said no, and then said he had been trying to find some pictures to hang. He's driving that particular joke into the ground at this point. If I see him tomorrow, I think I'm going to remind him that hanging pictures didn't get anyone anything. I can't tell if he is flirting or just clueless. Trust me to pick winners. My sister Aimes, said I have no taste when it comes to picking friends. Stais agrees. Maybe there is a training course I need to go through. Something so I don't feel so incompetent.

I'm weak, weak I tell you

I have finally broken down and made the chex mix. Of course, it isn't nearly as good as my aunt's, but I guess I'll just have to keep trying. Ah the trauma of cooking.
Didn't make it to Moe's today. Think I'm going to have to do it tomorrow. I have to do some work tomorrow anyway, so I might as well grab what I want for lunch.
Another Friday night at home. Can't say that I'm really upset about that. I'm trying to rearrange my Fridays so that I'm working later. This way I can stay out later on Thursdays. The method to my madness? There is a blues bar that has a special on Thursdays. Again with meeting people thing, although the main reason is so that I can listen to my music live.
Next week is my first week in the new location. Mostly new people (at least new to me), new building and new challenges. I don't know that I'm ready for new challenges. I think I'll be hiding under my covers this weekend. Maybe if I'm very lucky, no one will come looking for me.

All Shall Be Well

Everyone must bow down to Pete Townsend! Ok, maybe not so much with the bowing, but learn to appreciate! I'm not even talking the early stuff, I've been listening to the soundtrack for Iron Man and bouncing all around the place.
"I was naked and dreaming behind locked doors,
still hearing me screaming 'Take me I'm yours!'"

My week is finally over! I'd jump for joy, but I think the stress has bent my back into a new shape. Ah well. Such is life. Although, I'm a little worried about my mental status when I woke up excited this morning cause I'm gonna get to go to Moe's for a burrito. It is my weakness. My kryptonite I guess you could say. Not to say going to Moe's is an event, just that I'll be in that part of town today and I've been looking forward to it. I know, it is a sickness, but what are ya going to do?
I was all about sleeping in this morning, but alas and alak, I woke up at 5:30 a.m. anyway and then the cat wouldn't let me fall totally back asleep. And, I swear you have the wierdest dreams when all you can do is catch snatches of sleep. You know, those odd dreams that combine your fears about work and life with sitcom television? Where you're running down a hallway naked, and then Hugh Laurie shows up and starts telling you about why you aren't really sick? I can't be the only one that happens to.
Work took a new and ironic turn today. I've been spending the majority of the day at home, but got a call from my boss. He asked how I was doing so I started talking about work. Then he says, "No, how are you doing?" And, let me tell you, it is hard for people to talk in italics like that. So, started telling him thoughts and such, and how I felt some trepedation about where the company is going and how I fit into it, blah blah blah. Somehow I ended up with, "I'm not the only one who feels this way, you need to speak with your managers." Now we are having a meeting this afternoon cause I couldn't keep my mouth shut. Lovely. Oh well, it was a partial day off anyway.

Exhaustion squared

I'm all about sleeping in lately, however, I haven't been able to do that. I keep trying though. Me dragging my ass out of the bed every morning is incredibly humourous. I'm so glad that no one can see me trying to squeeze more sleep out of time.
Work is dragging me down as well. Getting this place shut down is wearing me out. Trying to take care of all the little details without completely losing my mind. I keep saying that if I make it to the weekend without wigging, I will ... well I can't say that I've been making any promises, but I've been keeping an open mind.
I'm disappointed that I'm leaving that area as well. I hadn't realized how many people I'd met down there. One of the guys, Big D, has been joking with me a lot recently. When I told him originally that I was leaving, he abruptly left our conversation. But recently, he's been making sure to drop by and check how I'm doing. In fact, I told him the picture hanging story, and he's been ribbing me about it. He came down yesterday and fixed one of the doors in the building for me. On his way out, he said, "Is this like hanging a picture for you, or do I have to go to your place to do that?" I laughed my ass off. He's a good guy. I'm hoping he comes down to visit me at my new building, but I won't hold my breath.
I'm worried about the kitten. He's been so bored. He doesn't have anything to do during the day and when I come home he just goes nuts. He is just meowing and running around. I'm beginning to feel awful and guilty. Wish I knew what to do. I'm seriously considering getting another cat just to keep him busy, but he doesn't always get along with other animals. I wish I knew what to do for him. I don't think the catnip is cutting it.

People bending broken rules

It's a Kenny Wayne kind of day today. I fell down today. I went ahead and sent Bruno a message. Apparently he's been crazy busy, he says. I'm guessing that is another fledgling friendship I can't keep together. That hermit thing keeps sounding better and better. I've spent most of the day indoors. Watched "The Incredibles" again. Found a website that could tell me where the easter eggs are too. Those weren't too bad. Also watched the first Thin Man from my new collection. Myrna Loy and William Powell. That would be the kind of relationship I would pattern after. Not necessarily how ditzy Nora is, but the relationship they have together. Of course, that isn't anything but good fiction, but oh the possibilities. I also did some exercise. Pathetic exercise, but exercise none-the-less.
I don't want to go back to work tomorrow. I have no desire to face the people I work with or talk to anyone else. I'm still not done unpacking either. No motivation.
On the bright side Moe didn't come back this weekend. Either he got the message, or he found someone else to sleep with. Either way, it is good news for me. Never heard back from the fireman either. I'm guessing one of his buddies told him I knew about what he had said. The brush has been cleared on that group of assholes. Onto a whole new group!

A few of my favorite things

I have been so decadent today. I've just been watching B movies, eating my Qdoba burritos and changing channels like a maniac. So many sappy romantic movies on some many channels at once. Of course, I also have spent entirely too much money on things I didn't need today. I went out and got the Thin Man Collection and the Incredibles DVDs. I should be spending money on sensible things, but I'm taking a page from Stais on this one. So long as I can pay my bills, I'm in ok shape, right.
Of course, it is 7:30 on a Saturday night as I'm writing this because I really have no life, but I'm satisfied with my day. I got good and plastered last night too, so I don't feel the urge to do it tonight. Trainwreck gave me all kinds of crap last night about staying in on a Friday, but I don't think he can completely understand. It is different for me, I think. I've never been good with people. At work, I own that environment. I'm more me. I'm loud, and I enjoy being around people, but get me by myself in a group of people I don't know, I either shrink back and observe or I overcompensate and become a caricature of myself.
Oh well. It is my caricature.
The cat is watching me while he is belly up on the carpet. I'm thinking he needs something. Maybe it's tequila.

Waiting for the week to come to a close

I know in my head that it is friday, but it sure doesn't feel like it. All the days keep running together and I'm not really seeing an end in sight. This could be because I really need to do laundry, wash dishes and take a nap, not necessarily in that order, but I don't believe so. I've been so very tired recently. I wonder if it is because I'm bored at work or if it is because the cat's latest personality quirk is to attack me in the middle of the night. I'm guessing he is stalking my hands while I sleep and then jumping the wily bastards in case they try and get the better of them. I feel bad for tossing my cat off the bed, but being woken up by a cat trying to subdue your favorite five fingers is a little disconcerting.
In other news, I haven't heard from Bruno in a week. I think I'm going to let that go. I figure if he wants to talk to me, he can find me. I gave it a shot, but he got mad when I said I sent him a message. "Well, I didn't get it." Apparently not hotshot, but I'm not upset, just trying to tell you I'm trying to keep up my end of the bargin here. What a cluster. He is entirely too high maintenance for me. I hate having to deal with men who are more difficult to be around then I am. The worst part about it, I am one of the most accomodating women I have ever met, but jeez Louise, give a little something. I don't want to do all the work.
Oh well. Life can't be all peaches and cream. Of course, I've never seen it really be peaches and cream, but it sounds like it is supposed to be nice.
It is Friday night and I'm at home, so any moment now Moe should come a knockin at my door. I've had such a crappy week, if he should drop by I'll be kickin him to the curb. I'm too tired and cranky to deal with JoeBob from the farm.
Tomorrow is the last day to deal with external people (read customers) for my location that is closing. I'm so very glad. I'm tired of dealing with these people. Of course, some of my regulars have been by, but they aren't enough to provide a distraction from the rest of the crazies. I'll be glad when this week is over. I think that is tomorrow.
All right. Gotta go and try something new. Exercising with a maragarita in hand.

Everybody must get stoned....

My week has just sucked ass. There is no way around it. My personal life just blows and professionally things are going slowly down hill. I don't do drugs, but I swear I've been thinking about it. If I could stop the world and get off, I would also do that.
I found out that one of the guys I dated last winter has been spreading around work what he and I did in the bedroom. What the fuck? Why on earth would anyone do that? The worst part of all of it, is that the people I work with on a very secondary level, also know this asshole and have heard these stories. On top of all of that, this guy got back in touch with me this week and kindly offered his services in the bedroom. I am so ticked off about it. Apparently my asshole meter is completely broken or I would never have gone out with this guy to begin with. What really irritates me is that our relationship was just based on sex. When I found someone I could connect with on more than just that level, I ended our relationship. I knew he was upset, but holy hell, I had no idea he was that upset. I'm disappointed in myself more than anything. I should have known better. Stais was telling me that I have to wade through the assholes to get to the good ones, but I'm thinking that I'm stuck in a bottomless pit of jackass. It is starting to smell down here.
Professionally I just want to get to October. I know I shouldn't wish time away, but I'm running out of ways to cope. Case in point, I'm almost out of tequila.
It can't get any better than this, it can't get any better than this.
I hope like hell it can't get any better than this.

And my new hair color ... Steel Wool

Holy hell, Batman! Where did this grey hair come from? It couldn't be all the stress I've been under for work could it? Naw. Anyway, I've been doing the traditional hair color dance. Shake, squirt, bend , twist, and then sit. I was going to do some blond at the roots, and then a little red elsewhere, but my buddy Sally Jane informed me that my hair could end up purple. As that would be a bad thing, I'm going to forgo the red this time. I'll come back to it in a couple of weeks. I'm getting ready to put another coat on, let's hope I don't have to use the shellack this time.
In other news, I haven't seen more for the rest of the weekend. Luckily (and can I tell you how sad it is that I feel this way?) I have to go into work tomorrow so I can escape his idea of a good time. Did I mention that he's been trying to figure out when I have to go into work? He was asking about that Friday night. "You don't seem to have a set pattern for when you go into work. Sometimes it is before 6 and sometimes it is just before 7. When do you have to be there anyway?" Yeah, cause I think you need to know that information. I'm thinking I'm going to have to just chill out at home and lay a little low, at least for today. I'll be busy enough with work for the next several days to keep me out of his sights.
I made taco salad this weekend to munch on. I should have had more meat, but otherwise I'm a happy camper. I need to start taking my meds again too. I'm putting on weight, and as I'm going without for 2(?) months, I'm not feeling my sexiest. Besides, the rumor is that exercise is good for you. I don't know if it makes you feel as good as good sex, but I'm willing to do anything to make me feel better about how I look. Although, exercise, ugh, the things I do to better my life. I'd rather be sitting on the couch for hours at a time, snacking and reading. Ohhh. Snacking. I haven't made Chex Mix in ages. That sounds incredible. Hmmmm. Gonna have to restrain myself or I'm going to find my ass out at the store picking up cereal and peanuts and pretzels... Bad girl, bad.
Time to shower anyway and pull this crap out of my hair.
Crap. I just realized I'm bored again.
Damn.

Your size...

So Moe dropped by last night. Lucky fucking me. (For those not paying attention, that was sarcasm.) He came in, and dropped his happy ass on my couch like he's been doing it for years. Then tells me he wants to know if I could make him something for dinner cause he hasn't had time to eat yet. As I tell him no, he wants to know if I've eaten. Blah blah blah. Apparently this country boy believes his shit doesn't stink, his parents are gods, living on a farm is the only way to live, pork livers are a delicacy and that because he has military experience, he is going to be better than anyone else at their job. And, then, just because he hadn't pissed me off enough, said he had a cousin who loved to eat, "well, I guess you could say she's about your size," as if I'm the general shape of a Volkswagon. I'm so flipping irritated for so many reasons. First, because he still believed I should be sleeping with him, although he is a scrawny thing and someone my size might do serious damage. Secondly because I let this pipsqueak get on my nerves. No, I'm not fashion model thin, but holy hell, I'm not a beached whale either. I can't remember the last time I was so ticked off at any one person.
I'm giving up on this making friends thing. I will live by myself, eating what the fuck I want, when I want, exercising if I feel the need to and I will just forgo dealing with others. People suck. Is it too late in my lifetime to become a hermit and live in a shack in the woods?

Walking in Memphis

I'm in a Marc Cohn kind of mood tonight. I've always wished I could sing, but it just isn't going to ever happen. I was pretty much aware of that when after singing in the church choir, I was told I could serve the church in other ways. Oh well. So long as I do it at home, everything will be kosher.
It can't be right that I'm so tired, but I feel like I've been running all day. And since I know my fat ass can't take that, I must have been really working. It could also be that Bruno called last night and interrupted my sleep. That is actually pretty odd, considering I usually wake up before the phone rings, but not last night. Wow. It took a solid five minutes before I realized who the hell I was talking to. It was a fairly odd conversation too. He told me about some stuff he's been doing recently, including the link I've added tonight. www.streetblast.com
He's such an odd duck sometimes. He has filled up his off time with all these extracurricular activities, stuff he loves to do, but will still be stressed about how it is working. I'm not sure if he ever allows himself to cut loose. Anyway, he was complaining that I never call him, but a) he never has any free time to do anything, b) I'm not even sure he likes to be around me all that much as we've never spent that much time just hanging out, and 3) I'm not sure what he wants from me.
I've said it before, I just don't understand men. I'm aware that they aren't that difficult to understand, but I swear I get the difficult ones. He was ticked off about how I was treated by Moe, even though I'm fairly sure I should never have gone downstairs to begin with. Until there is an instruction book for Bruno's model, I will keep playing it by ear. He wants me to call more often so I will do what I can. I just keep feeling like I'm intruding on him doing more important things.
Although, it could just be the day. It was an odd one all around. We are closing the location I've been working at, (which, yes, does suck, but my people have been taken care of and that's all that matters) so it seems that everyone and their brother has come out of the woodwork. Favorite customers of mine that I haven't seen in ages popped into the store all day. Guys I haven't seen in a while dropped by to flirt and give hugs. Everyone wanted to know which location I was going to so they could drop by again. This elderly gentleman was flirting with me, just making me laugh (which those in the know know it is loud and long), when he said, "You know those little yapping dogs that chase after semi's? I'm like that with pretty girls like you, I wouldn't know what to do with you if I had you." I don't know how happy I am about being a semi, but I'll get by. The planets must have been aligned just right tonight.
Either way, it was nice to just enjoy my day at work instead of being stressed out all the time. There is a certain peace you get when you finally know what the hell is going on in your job. I have felt better about things than I have in a long time. Now if I can just pick up a social life along the way, I'll be in like Flynn.
In other news, I was trying to figure out how to add my photo on here, but have failed miserably at it so I will remain incognito. Besides, my pic doesn't look as professional as some of the other blogs in here, so perhaps it is for the best.
I also am doing a load of laundry while typing this up. Now, I know that doesn't sound nearly exciting enough to post, but as the appliances are new I've been doing the happy dance in my chair for a little while now.
That is about it for now. I've little things to report, but will wait for later as I need to snag a cigarette and finish off my margarita.
Oh, and for those concerned, I did find all my toys. I know there was some trepidation, but all is good in the household. Although I could use a backrub. Hmmm. Moe is downstairs.... Maybe I could hang some pictures for him.
On second thought, I haven't had enough to drink for that. I guess I'll be taking a hot bubble bath. Again.