My week has just sucked ass. There is no way around it. My personal life just blows and professionally things are going slowly down hill. I don't do drugs, but I swear I've been thinking about it. If I could stop the world and get off, I would also do that.
I found out that one of the guys I dated last winter has been spreading around work what he and I did in the bedroom. What the fuck? Why on earth would anyone do that? The worst part of all of it, is that the people I work with on a very secondary level, also know this asshole and have heard these stories. On top of all of that, this guy got back in touch with me this week and kindly offered his services in the bedroom. I am so ticked off about it. Apparently my asshole meter is completely broken or I would never have gone out with this guy to begin with. What really irritates me is that our relationship was just based on sex. When I found someone I could connect with on more than just that level, I ended our relationship. I knew he was upset, but holy hell, I had no idea he was that upset. I'm disappointed in myself more than anything. I should have known better. Stais was telling me that I have to wade through the assholes to get to the good ones, but I'm thinking that I'm stuck in a bottomless pit of jackass. It is starting to smell down here.
Professionally I just want to get to October. I know I shouldn't wish time away, but I'm running out of ways to cope. Case in point, I'm almost out of tequila.
It can't get any better than this, it can't get any better than this.
I hope like hell it can't get any better than this.
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My second, and last, wife went through 3 years of law school while we were married. 3 month prior to graduation, she left me. The point? You can go as far as marrying a person thinking they are "the one" and find out later that they are assholes. I have decided to look for people that rub me the wrong way first, and see if they turn out to be decent later.
Oh, and as far as things not getting any better than this....
The philosophy that has helped me get through more bad crap than anything is:
It will get worse before it gets better.
I know that sounds like negative reasoning, but it actually helped me get through some deep, serious shit without putting a gun to my head - and I do own a gun.
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