Spoiled Rotten

Life really isn't that bad, ya know. Granted I have no friends in town, I'm working entirely too much, and my cat is the only thing I can stand to have around me all the time, but really things aren't going that bad. If you give me a couple of minutes, I'm sure I can find that silver lining. Hang on, I'm still looking. Oh, I know. I've figured out how close I actually live to the Ohio. It is just about ten minutes on back roads to the river. I have never lived this close to a major river before, and I have to admit it is really cool. I got up late this morning so I didn't get any shots of the sun coming up, but it was still cool as hell to drive down there this morning. It isn't nearly as wide as the Mississippi, but it is still relatively cool.

I came to a relatively ugly conclusion the other day, well I guess that is all relative. I haven't heard from Bruno in quite sometime, correct? Well, what if he views me the same way I view Merle? I don't have the cojones to tell Merle, "Look, I'm sure you are a good guy, but I find you creepy and shallow and I don't really want to be your friend," so what if that is how Bruno sees me? I understand now. So, I've deleted his number, his email and all that other crap because I don't want to be tempted to keep walking into that brick wall. The kicker of it is it used to be so devastating when a friend dropped me, but apparently I'm growing again, because now I see it as an evolution of me. I still don't know what his purpose in my life was, but I guess he fulfilled it. A hit and run friendship. I've decided to pull back a lot recently as well. I'm not calling friends or family nearly as much as I used to. It isn't their jobs to keep me sane and happy, it is mine. Fall is here and winter is coming and I can just sit at home, reading books and crocheting my little heart out while I gear up for spring to shed. I know it makes no sense to anyone else, but all of this makes complete sense to me. Whatever is coming, I feel I'm ready for it.

On a lighter note, I've been completely spoiled by a friend who sent me a care package. Saltwater taffy from Silver Dollar City, and plates and mugs with cats on them. I'll probably call her tonight to thank her and catch up with her life.

The air is getting cooler.