Waiting for the script

After a long day at work, I got to see one of my favorite Shakespearean films, "Much Ado About Nothing". One of my favorite parts of the book is when John the Bastard is going off on Conrad about how sick he is of other people telling him what to do. Poor Keanu completely blows it, but no matter how overplayed he does it, he can't take away from the raw power of the words. "If I had my mouth I would bite." How often do we all feel that way, smiling at co-workers bad jokes, getting kicked in the teeth for things we haven't done wrong, being polite to customers even though you just want to smack them. For as much as I don't really like people, I find it amazing that I've been working in retail for over ten years. I simply don't believe that there is a job out there that will allow me to smoke, drink and read books. If there is though, it would probably burn out my favorite pasttime.
There is an opening for a manager in Bowling Green, KY. I believe I'm going to post for it tomorrow. The job feels right, but I wish I knew if I was supposed to be going there or not. I wish there was a book just entitled Carrie's Life, that would give the pointers for where I've been and where the hell I'm suppposed to be going. Sure there are people who think the point to life is the journey, the adventure in the everyday decisions that could change your life forever, but who the hell really wants that? Where is my script that tells me what to say, when to go the grocery store and where I'm supposed to be living my life? Where is the road map that doesn't just pinpoint where I've been, but lets me know which direction to take? The hell with taking the road less traveled, someone just give me a truck stop and an astrologist so I can figure out where to pick my life back up again.
Oh well. I'm tired so I'm rambling. I'll try and get back to you later on this week.